It’s four years since my Dad had passed and I had this dream.
I am walking up through stairs and my Dad was walking down. And when we passed each other. I went to him. And I sat beside him. Hugged him. I woke up smiling to myself. Because the hug felt so real. It soothed my longing heart. It’s your birthday soon.
I miss you Dad.
I am staying away to drinking until I drop. I missed the chance to be there more by your side. I wished I could take you to places. I want to explore places with you and talked more about life. Me and my brothers made it here in Canada.
We can eat things we can’t before. We have our own money to support our own selves too. We are slowly accepting that these things we really can’t do with you anymore but a memory of you is what really kept us here.
Immigrating was hard. But I can’t imagine if we are still in the Philippines and you are not there anymore with us. I hope that you are doing well in there. I hope that you are not feeling any pain and you are smiling as well.
Dad, a lot of things had happened to me. I once hid myself to the world even my own self. I thought it was the right thing to do. I ended up hurting myself that way because I didn’t want any one to see the pain that I am going through while I am grieving.
When you left me and it hurt me more than a breakup I have ever experienced.
Right now, I constantly ask myself how will I make your decision to send us here worth it. I want you to be always be proud of me. I will keep going to places and write my experiences.
I started living again. Little by little. Coming out of my room more than ever. Embracing life. One day at a time.
You were my strength. And I needed to be strong without you by my side. But at least you are in my heart always and my mind.
I also found a beautiful love for me. I am happy now. And maybe this is your way to greet me. I miss you too Dad. I’ll visit you soon.
Thank you for visiting me in my dream. I had the chance to get through the beautiful memories you gave me and my brothers.
Thank you because you were always the wind beneath my wings. I’ve accomplished a lot in my life by having you.
Every thing I do, win or lose, that’s why I love joining competitions because I have you.
You broke your generational curse and that’s how we afford to live this life.
You are a beautiful father, the best one, that God gave me.
